Moving Into Stillness

Recently I’ve been keen on observation of thought response pattern and the sensations that are connected to these conditional thought habits. From an inner work perspective my learning in Flamenco has revealed much classified as emotion falls under this category of sensation and unconsciously attached thought pattern. When one sees the reflexive nature of our responses, impartially observing sensations as such and separating these out from the accompanying “thoughts”, it becomes less easy to be convinced of dramatizations.
Cutting a wedge of consciousness into all this reflex response needs strong intention and good skill in impartial self observation. Impartial self observation happens to be the best mode of operation when attempting to learn a new moving skill. It comes closest to becoming “ye as little children”, foundational to learning how to learn. There is the classic example of a child learning how to walk, falling, getting back up and trying again. The psychosis or neurosis that produces self inflation, defeat, and thus obstacle to learning is not yet present, there is nothing to prove.
It is useful to learn some intentional movement skill such as dance, and apply one’s practice of self observation to this learning. In this way we can catch sight of our locked in habitual postures and in their observation find keys to break free of these locks. We fall into these postures automatically, evoking the same kind of thought patterning that supports core beliefs adopted about the nature of our reality. Catching oneself in this can show the moving center origins of feelings, there are inner postures that accompany the outer. Trying to get directly at one’s emotions proves not as effective as working with habits of movement. When one tries to learn a new way of moving the body it is necessary to become aware of movement in the moment at least enough to not fall into customary postural habits, but to use the body’s ability at mimicry to a consciously intended aim. In so doing we bring consciousness into what is unconscious.
To illustrate how this plays practically for me – recently upon hearing news that has some bearing on my finances, the body tensed up and this was good reminder to relax intentionally. Years of dance training has shown me that relaxation is a key to good learning and this translates throughout my life. I noted my mind had already started picturing worst case scenarios through which I’d have to make my way…it was subtle, automatic, mechanical movement of the brain – a set of postures, one falling into the other, with corresponding tensions in the body. These tensions keep me bound to the three dimensional tactile hallucination as a victim instead of as a player.
With this observation, self- remembrance was given a real energetic boost and a new space of objectivity was experienced. I looked upon the scene in which this body seemed to be immersed as a frozen tableau, at least for a moment. Significance and dimensional depth was diffused out of the picture as I brought more presence to bear upon the moment. I relinquished the illusion of movement in time and space enough to touch upon the stillness underneath the patchwork quilted surface of phenomena. I was brought to the still point in the midst of the movement of my life. And when I can tolerate eternity, I can have it. Ole!