It is a good thing when one finds space between what is and one’s belief about what is. To be able to point at belief and see it as such is a form of freedom and the beginning state of true sacrifice. As Rumi has indicated, free will is given so that it may be given up freely. One must have something in order to give it.
I recall as a child talking about God with my friend who went to parochial school. She told me that whenever she wanted something she prayed to God for it and it would happen. I felt sad because things didn’t work out that way for me, try as I did to pray and believe. Thing is, it never felt right to pray for something for myself. I tried to understand the words to the prayers I knew. I greatly feared punishment. One must pay for one’s existence.
Yes, it was a Hispanic/Catholic environment laced with a touch of the military. I now understand there were other extreme circumstances that heavily influenced this orientation. That one must pay for one’s existence is a useful posture from a Work perspective. But there has been a lot of overlay to clear in order to arrive at a healthy working interpretation of this and other concepts.
I am grateful to have been given the help I continue to get. There are many different scrub brushes used in the process. This goes on knowingly at times, unknowingly a lot, despite the fact that I deliberately subject myself to cleansing conditions with intention. Here’s another thing I’ve learned – having intention doesn’t mean having control. Then one day unexpectedly there is clearing enough for a new sun to rise. One sees the shadow for what it is.
Something has been unfolding recently, helping to release my confusion about intention and its relationship to surrender. What seems clear in this chamber here now is that intention is needed for effective surrender to take place. And surrender to intention is what one is doing. It is the intention to work I surrender to, however that translates in any moment. To help me, I may obligate myself to a person, group or cause, but the fundamental intention is to work, and this is what I wish to remember and surrender to. This is the inner activity that is based in Source, not as a result.
The renewal of intention to work is an ongoing thing. Effective work on self will produce change of being, and one’s intending will reflect the state of being in which one is working. From my perspective, change is partially the result of removal of that which keeps us bound in sleep. With this removal a re-alignment process occurs that enables better functioning of the machine, it becomes more effective as a transformational apparatus and instrument of our Work intention.
This implies the development of the ability to observe oneself impartially. There is one who witnesses the fact of change, the death, the phoenix rising. There is a state in which the cycle stops, according to Rumi, the burning and rising from ash is stopped and the phoenix perches onto Mt. Qaf, which is I guess akin to Mt. Sinai – one of those mystical and mysterious at the top kind of places. Only from such a mountain dweller can one really get a gauge of one’s progress along the climb. Hitching oneself to that star is a very good idea. The climb is still yours to make, but a mountain dweller, a teacher whose movement is sourced at stillness, can tell you the surest path. That mountain dweller is in fact a reflection of one’s own being, actually is one’s own being, in a way.
If we have found such a one, such a point of reference as the mountain dweller, then we have found a good mirror. Sometimes, often, it can be very hard to remember that one is looking at one’s own reflection, especially through one’s inner storms. But when one dares to look, given the right attitude and intention, and especially with helpful tools of discernment, it is possible to see in the midst of lightning the cause of lightning.
A very jagged experience of relationship with the mountain dweller indicates the presence of a hook. This is always so. To look right into that jaggedness armed with the light of intention and a well developed attention, there is chance of dissolving it, seeing it for the illusion it is, and thus facilitate a better climb. Which isn’t a climb, actually, so much as it is a settling in, deeper into the stillness of being. The mountain dweller is the in dweller. To get at Mt. Sinai, where the Lord is said to be fighting the forces of good and evil, one must climb in. Happy Trails to all.
Waking The Infinite on The Persistence of Flowers (No… muspelspark on Alighting piph on Ranting Vs. Wonder muspelspark on Flow muspelspark on Seeing