As a child I was called Furia by my uncle, which means Fury. Teachers gave me good grades with comments about my strong feelings needing to tone down. As a young adult these strong feelings nearly killed me. I have come to understand that much of this was chemical and conditional. I have also recapitulated blacked out trauma memory that informed me of the extreme oppression underlying my fury.
After years of work on self, many deaths and rebirths, I find myself at a place of looking more directly at the heart, being cleared of the notion that my strong feelings were necessarily reflective of heart activity. And yet, somewhere there is a connection. According to the work of Paul Pearsall, author of “The Heart’s Code”, the heart has a more expedient form of intelligence, from one perspective, than the brain, holding information that clearly links body, mind, and spirit. Foundational to what is presented in this book is cellular memory theory and technology. What is presented is that the heart not only loves and feels, but is capable of thinking, remembering, and communicating with other hearts. It helps regulate immunity. It contains stored information that continually pulses through the body.
There is an exercise given by Pema Chodron of simply placing the hand on the chest, at the heart chakra, and being present in the space, experiencing the interconnectedness with others, the place of compassion. When present with other beings or at a place of much distraction it is particularly effective. It activates remembrance, bringing to light many things at once – distilled down to being, the tremblingly still beauty of pure being. It is here where I can feel the aliveness of inanimate objects, those masters of praise, as Rumi calls them, and begin to hear the praise they sing.
When speaking of the chakras, the heart is considered a central point of convergence where energy is transmuted from the “lower” chakras that influence our physical existence to the higher chakras of the more abstract realms of mind and spirit. In yet another model, the heart must be turned on to function correctly, which is to say, such that higher emotion becomes a possibility, and it is turned on by reversing the functions of the fore-brain and the “tail brain.”Sounds daunting, yet we have all experienced such moments. We have all had experience with higher being functions of the heart, of the sublime.
My situation has put me in a unique position of necessity. Seems I must look at matters of the heart more directly. Walking into the cave of shadows, confronting what was once blacked out in my memory has been a wondrous process. The place of reconciliation, the place of witness is the sheerest of identities. Too many impressions pass through at this place to begin to express, but the sum total give me the message to be in active receptivity to data that will inform my heart’s intelligence and hone its discerning faculty.
It’s a tricky business indeed because as soon as the human brontosaurus brain gets hold of anything, it can make harlequin novel mincemeat out of a tender perfection. Discernment will come at a price unless one is a conceited king or queen. I remember a movie that showed a known tyrant “frolicking” in a pool with some of his subordinates. They swam a race from one end to the other – he cut a path diagonally that disabled the other racers, reached the end and proudly claimed his victory. Of course, on fear of death everyone applauded his win. Human brontosaurus brain, primate hierarchy based principles, planet earth – there is a combination here that is already too prevalent.
I’m for the evolutionary movement that would have me leave behind the functions of the human brontosaurus brain and the conditioning of the human primate hierarchy.I need help to go against the momentum of organic conditioning to the automatic continuum of life, which forces my attention to wander from the path of my intent. Don’t yet find myself plugged in to the energy source that keeps me as steadily awake as my growing sense of obligation would have me be, and the consequences are deadly: harlequin novel mincemeat pie which I am greatly allergic to. A solution at the moment is to open myself up to scrutiny and plug into a larger energy source by taking on this show, “Journey to the Heart” on GorebaggTV. In this obligation that will connect me to others of similar interest I might gain fresh insight and clarity to help keep me where it seems best to hang, in surrender, good and humble.
When I say surrender I point to a mighty strength. Surrender implies trust. I have come to see trust as a start and endpoint all at once. In my work with Gold’s “Angel’s Healing Journey” and the “American Book of the Dead” I see a useful model. It can be said that at the point of Clear Light one is at a place of absolute trust, completely surrendered in pure being, objective reality, the nothingness from which our something-ness emerges. Each of the chambers encountered in the entropic decrease of that clear light point shows how that trust is being fractionated into ego based qualities such as fear, jealousy, hunger, compulsion. If we can develop the habits that incline us back toward the clear light, we will find ourselves simultaneously knowing trust, a natural result of knowing where we come from. For the correct development of the quality of trust that I speak of here, discernment is of the essence.
Trust and discernment bear a relationship to explore at this time, and this will be the first show’s focus. It occurs to me to suggest an experiment for those who would be inclined to participate. Try the exercise of placing the hand on the chest, where you feel the heart energy. A start point for discernment is knowledge of whether we are awake or asleep. Place the hand on the heart while somewhere with others as well as alone, remaining there until one has the experience of presence. The absence of thought can be a good indicator and there might be whole body awareness, a different kind of processing of impressions. Whatever wakefulness is to you, be there intentionally for a spot of time while holding the hand to the heart. Allow impressions to register such that you can retrieve them and bring them to the space of the show tomorrow evening.
I will be encouraging audience participation. God encourages audience participation. Human brontosaurus brain can’t hear the encouraging shouts until a two by four hits it where it hurts. An awakened heart however, tells a different story – sings praise. Let’s bring these different stories and songs to tomorrow night’s spirit meal potluck at the tavern where we meet on our Journey to the Heart. See you online at GorebaggTV/JustinTV at 6 pm PST this Thursday, February 7.